I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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