I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize