OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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