If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
