i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
