"it" just moved
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
