sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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