I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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