Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
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