If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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