she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
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