Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize