is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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