I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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