So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Randomize
