He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Randomize
