So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I need moral support for this bender
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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