Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
