i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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