I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
