Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Randomize