It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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