My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
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