Do you still have your period?
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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