WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
