My first STD was from a foam party
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
