but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
