So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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