uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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