At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize