So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
