She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Randomize
