Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize