Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Randomize
