I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
