My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
operation harelip BJ is a go
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
