At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize