Someone shit on the floor
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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