This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I am spending my child support on dildos
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
