i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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