Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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