i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Randomize
