Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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