Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
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