Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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