If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
