did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
