I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I've blown a few things in my day
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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