So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
