Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
