my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
