please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
